This article was originally published on yourtango.com on December 12, 2016. T-Ann is a contributor to this article.
Turn that critical eye on yourself.
Life hacks are wonderful things.
If you’re not familiar with the term, it means any kind of trick, shortcut, or best practice that you can use to make your life better, faster, or simpler. Often times, they’re uber-practical — like ways to organize your phone charger cords or how to pack your suitcase for ultimate space-efficiency — but life hacks can also be applied to your personal relationships as well.
Even your relationship with yourself. (It’s true!)
In our latest Expert video, Senior VP of YourTango Experts Melanie Gorman proposed a life hack scenario to a group of our psychologists, counselors, and life coaches — how can a person get to know themselves better through their relationships with other people?
It’s the ultimate “Know Thyself” hack. We spend so much time judging and critiquing the other people in our lives, so it begs the question — can we turn those critical insights inward? Can we use what we’ve learned in our analyses of others to give us a better understanding of who we are?
The short answer is “YES.”
You can watch their full comments in the video above, but the team of our Experts — Clara Wisner, T-Ann Pierce, Kathryn Foster, and Helen Fisher — definitely suggested some tangible, insightful, and ingenious methods for learning more about yourself by taking a critical look at the relationships in your life.
Here are 5 of their best suggestions…
1. Think of your relationship as a delivery service.
This might sound a little corny, but try to think of a relationship as an actual SHIP, a cargo ship that makes deliveries.
Because it’s important to realize that relationships should be mutually beneficial. When we interact with someone, we should think about what we’re getting from the relationship. Is it love, companionship, empathy, validation? What is that relationship delivering to us that we need to unpack and make room for in our lives? And what does it say about us that we require those deliveries?
Beyond that, once you can start imagining the ship metaphor, you can turn it around and ask yourself, “Well, what am I delivering to my friends and family in return? Am I delivering to them what they need?” It can be really eye-opening.
For more practical tips on boosting your happiness, check out Tips So You Can Be Happier. It’s full of no-nonsense advice to help you live a more joyful life, with a few laughs along the way. Because let’s face it—happiness doesn’t have to be complicated!